How to Get Out of Your Own Way
& find joy even when the world feels like it is churning
This last week and a half has felt like a lot. If you’re tired and foggy and a bit discombobulated, you are in good company. The kettle is on, pull up a seat.
This space is for days, weeks, seasons like these.
None of us were made to do this journey alone. And that is coming from an expert at introverting.
I’ve been reading Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer. It is so good I haven’t made it past chapter 1 because I keep returning to savor the words in the preface.
She talks about how, while you can braid sweetgrass alone by tying it to a chair or holding it between your teeth, the best way to braid is with someone else holding the other end for you.
There’s a kind of creativity that only comes alive in connection and community. It has had me thinking a lot about the season we are in and this corner of the internet.
These days, so much seems to aim at distracting and dividing us, even from ourselves.
We are way easier to control that way. To market to. To influence.
Creativity born from connection is dangerous to all who want to preserve the status quo and keep change at bay.
But what if healing the divide starts with weaving something greater than any of us could weave alone? I hold so much hope for our journey here to be part of that woven tapestry.
The Brave Work of Wanting More
Cue moving to Minnesota story time.
Next year, my medical insurance for mediocre coverage and diminishing access here in Florida will likely be upwards of 35-40K. No, that isn’t a typo. I can’t even get into see specialists until well into 2026.
It is untenable. Our medical system is falling apart at the seams and people’s lives are at stake.
So I’ve been applying for jobs in MN that would make a move more straightforward.
I have many runner-up awards at this point. If the right door opened in that regard, I would joyfully walk through it. But it hasn’t. Not yet, at least.
I can’t control whether I get hired or how congress is going to impact my medical care. I can’t control the housing market and what I will sell my house for. There’s a lot I cannot control.
It is very easy to let worrying about the things you can’t control distract you from doing something about the things you can control.
The thing I can control— sitting my butt in the seat every morning to write this book. And being grateful for a brain that is finally clear enough to do so, and all the people who believe in this project’s importance.
Friends who are willing to hold the end of this bit of sweetgrass, so I might braid it.
Community. You. The idea of a self-made anything is such a myth.
I’m throwing all my eggs in the writer life basket these days as I finish this book proposal and spill my heart on a page.
What is the thing you want to write or paint or make that needs a community of courage to be part of the creative process?
When you see where you wish to go, but don’t know how to get there… it is a brave thing to not let your bottom-line become your horizon line.
It’s a brave thing to keep inching forward. To hold on to the dream. To trust the people on the path.
Learning what it is you are actually looking for, mapping out that desire so it might become real… friend, that work it is so intensely vulnerable.
I think, women especially, we are told it is holy to bypass our will and suffocate our wants.
Turn ourselves off to care for everyone else.
It’s expected. Ingrained. Someone else’s will be done. Again and again and again.
Until we freeze in the glaring headlights of what everyone else expects and wants and needs, and stand severed from our own agency and intuition.
That’s the not-knowing that can easily translate into feeling creatively stuck, frozen, and shut down.
It isn’t the blank page that shuts us down, it’s being disconnected from ourselves.
Here’s where wonder helps us find a way back home.
It starts with curiosity. Of trying things on. Figuring out what we like. What we don’t like.
Playing with different styles and supplies and ideas. Allowing ourselves the freedom to change and grow and be different right now than we were even an hour ago.
You have permission to dream bigger than your bottom line. You have permission to show up for yourself, just as much as you would for someone else. You have permission to change your mind. To like what you like because you like it.
If you feel stuck or in that meh place where nothing really feels like it fits, allow that scratchy, uncomfortable sense to become an invitation to get curious and try new things.
Reinvent yourself every day until you find the you that feels most like home.
You deserve to find that part of who you are, and all the gifts they bring to your world.
Some of My Small Wonders So Far
It’s almost a whole month into our summer of small wonders. How are you doing? Want to join in? Here are the details. You can jump in on whatever day you start.
These are a few of my favorites from my journaling. I’ve been writing what I call micro essays and hope posts.
Lemon balm, mint, and berries take sunshine and water and create sustenance and healing. Then I brew it into tea. My tea literally is steeped in light. That is mind-blowing in the best way possible.
The best books are the ones you can have conversations with.
I cut open a melon this morning. It tasted like summer and sunshine.
Savoring the iced watermelon from the fridge, sweeter than I expected. Reminding me, good is still waiting around corners we don’t see coming.
It’s ok if it hasn’t clicked yet. Some moments are wild-edged, raw summer rainstorms that only make sense when your colors come alive after they have passed.
Life isn’t a straight line. It’s more like scattered puzzle pieces, squiggles, and unexpected colors. But one day, you’ll look back and see it always had a shape. And even at its messiest — its beauty was breathtaking.
And I Made Us Something…
With everything going on in the world, having some supportive practices for coping with anxiety has been such a game changer for me.
Putting those practices in a printable bucket list that can live on my wall, has brought joy into hard moments.
I made this and shared a free version on Insta last week.
But I wanted to create a tool that could go a little deeper. So I created this hand-illustrated Resilience Bucket List for anxiety that includes the free wall printable plus a printable pocket card stack and reflective journaling questions for each bucket list practice.
Paid subscribers, you can find the download link at the bottom of this email. 🎉 because it is included in your subscription. (I also created you a dashboard with simple links to make navigating all our archives and challenges easier. I want you to be able to find and use all the things you have access to!)
For those of you who would like to read the details and perhaps purchase it as a standalone resource, just click this button ⬇️.
I can’t do what I do without y’all. I am forever grateful.
P.S. Gather up your favorite small wonders you’ve been collecting. I’m sending out a Sunday celebration post here this weekend to get us sharing in the comments! I can’t wait to read all the beauty you’ve been finding.