I was scrolling the internet way later than I should have earlier this week and saw someone sharing their daily to-do list. One of the comments said something to the effect of, “WOW, you’re SO busy!” It was written with a glow of admiration.
Why is it that we (ahem, moi) tend to instinctively elevate busy as a heroic state of being?
Have you ever had your calendar so filled it felt like you didn’t have space to breathe?
I sure have.
There have been seasons that my to-do list and schedule resembled a Hoarders episode. Sleep was optional. Meals were eaten on the go. The more I packed in, the more important my life felt. The more exhausted I became.
If I had gone to a state college, my high school college course load would have landed me in my junior year at the age of 17. It is such a good thing I went to a university that unceremoniously plopped me in my second semester of being a freshman.
It has taken me most of my life to learn to slow down. To stop wearing busy as a badge of honor. And I am learning a little more every day.
Creative life, making things, creativity itself takes time. It can’t be rushed.
If you are feeling overwhelmed, you aren’t alone. We have more information thrown at us than any other generation before us. Our world is an experiment and we are the subjects.
It’s noisy out there.
And noise comes in many forms. One of them I like to call: Schedule noise.
It’s the kind of noise that feels like the weight of 168 hours pressing down on you each calendar week.
It is the noise that spills out of our schedules and doesn’t give us a chance to just be. To breathe. To stare out a window. To quietly walk through the woods. To woolgather.
Woolgathering. It’s a quirky term that means something akin to daydreaming and staring out of windows. And it is essential for our creative wellbeing.
The brain has something called the Default Mode Network (DMN)1. Have you ever been reading and your mind wandered to the point you don’t remember anything you just read?
That’s your Default Mode at work. And it’s a critical part of the creative process.
(Hi, I’m also your friendly neuroscience nerd at your service. Brains are SO fascinating!)
Studies show that when we rest, daydream, or let our minds wander, this part of the brain is very engaged. It is getting the active parts of our brain ready for the next thing we are doing.
Also, when we rest, the DMN helps gather and integrate the ideas and information needed for creative and flexible thinking.
There’s a reason why we feel scattered when we are overcommitted and stretched too thin. Our brains may not have had the time needed to process.
I think of it like when I have a big art project I’m working on. My studio usually looks like someone dumped everything out on the floor by the time I’m done. To go on to the next project, I need to tidy the space to start over again.
That time between projects I take to reorganize my world happens for our brains when we rest and let our minds wander.
The reason “schedule noise” chips away at our creativity and resilience often leading to overwhelm is there isn’t enough rest time for our brains to slip into Default Mode. As we run from thing to thing, it can become like static that builds up.
Each of us needs different amounts of space and rest. And those needs will change based on our life seasons, capacity, and stress levels.
So. What if daydreaming isn’t laziness? What if allowing time to wander and slow down is exactly what we need to care for our creativity?
For me, I’m trying a few things out.
I unsubscribed to Netflix (again). I turned off all my notifications. I usually write in silence. When I take breaks it’s outside gardening or making things in the kitchen. I make time for sitting with a cup of tea and staring out my window.
I’m limiting my schedule to 1-2 coffee dates every 7-10 days.
I’m padding my schedule with space because I’m learning my brain has to have it. To be well. And so I can create the things I share with you here.
I am a deep introvert, so this probably sounds like a lot. Extroverts I am OK. Really.
Some seasons are just busy. But when I have a choice, I slow things way down.
Life isn’t usually an emergency. However, our brains can feel like it is if we don’t take the time that we need to slow down in between all the things.
If you feel stuck, overwhelmed, like you are fighting waves that just keep coming, pull out your calendar.
Look at all the appointments, projects, Zoom calls, daily activities… then make a list of all the things that aren’t on it.
Laundry. School pickups. After school things. Breakfast prep. Meal prep. Write it all down.
Because you might have more schedule noise than you realize.
Where can you make just a little more margin in the between spaces? How can you curate your schedule in a way that works for you?
Are there times you scroll (which is using the active brain networks) you could stop instead?
Because busy isn’t a badge of honor. And we don’t have to wear it like it is.
All my love,